Raising small children through the teen years was actually much easier than dealing with the things they encounter as young adults. I often wish someone would have told me that or at least attempted to. Even so, would it have made a difference; would I have done anything differently?
I always believed that in trying to be be a good role model by being encouraging, optimistic and compassionate would certainly give them the tools they would need to make positive decisions in their lives. I still believe that, as opposed to parenting the opposite way. However, I am learning that there are no guarantees in who they will become, the decisions they will make, the moral choices they will decide to embrace or how they will leave their mark in the world.
I use to think of peer pressure and bullying episodes occurring in their childhood & teen years, yet that is not where it ends. I am finding that the challenging tests happen as they go out into the real world. It is who they meet, who they become friends with, who they work with, who they date and eventually even who they marry, which appears to be the major influenced on who they will become.
As a parent I can hope and pray that they will be able to hold their own and stand up for what they have been taught as right and wrong. It is even more wonderful if others can influence them in affirming ways; but not in ways that cause sadness, anger, conflict and negativity. In my times of doubt and worry I have often prayed that it would be
them making a positive difference in the lives of others; of
them being an example of what is good, kind and right.
Of course I am not a perfect parent nor are they perfect children; but they certainly have been raised with love, laughter and kindness to others. They have been raised to look at the glass as being half full instead of half empty. Above all, they have been raised to believe and trust in God.
Perhaps it is their idealistic view of life as young adults that leads them on a path of discovering and believing in other avenues. Maybe we all did that at one point in our lives...
I want to believe that as they grow and have families, raising their own children, that they will draw guidance from how they were brought up and see the possibility that it was the "
positives" that they were raised with that became the best part of who they really are. That is my prayer...
Proverbs 22:6King James Version (KJV)
6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.